Introduction letter
Introduction letter
Dear Professor Brad
I am writing to introduce myself and provide you with some insights about my background, skills and interest. My name is Jack a year 1 student studying in Singapore Institute of Technology majoring in Mechanical Engineering. Firstly, the reason why I chose mechanical engineering specifically is because I wanted to study something that is versatile, and I would want to work in the bank or finance industry. Another reason is because I have been advised that banks do hire engineers due to our problem-solving abilities. During my year 2 specialization, I would like to take on mechatronics route as it will incorporate IT related modules which would be more relevant to the industry I am planning to take in the future.
During my time in SIT, I have participated in a few CCAs such
as tennis, dance and SIT ambassador. I joined CCA is because it is the last few
years of my student life, and I would like to make the best out of it. Outside
of class, my interest is watching K-pop and enjoying leisure drinks with my group
of friends.
One of my strengths lies in my sociability, I find it easy to initiate and maintain conversations and collaborate effectively with others. I have a wide network of friends both within and outside of SIT. This attribute of mine will come in handy when I am working in a group project be it for school or in work, I am able to communicate and work well with my groupmates. However, on area I'm actively working on is managing my commitments more effectively. I have a tendency to take on too many tasks, which sometimes leads to distraction. I am committed to improving my time management and focus skills.
I think one unique thing about myself would be the ability to effectively communicate with people from different backgrounds. This ability to foster comfortable and productive interaction is something I hold dear and intend to continue developing during my time at SIT.
I am looking forward to my time here in university and
hopefully I can make the best out of my life before I step foot in the working
world.
Regards
Jack
Hi Jack, I enjoyed reading your letter and it explained very well on why you chose this course, as well as your CCAs and interest. However, I felt that you could go more into detail on certain points, such as what is distracting you, why being sociable is a good thing as well as why being able to effectively communicate with people from different background is a good skill. It would also be good to list out some of your goals that you may have going into this course. Overall, I enjoyed reading your introduction letter and it was nice knowing more about you from this letter. I hope you are able to achieve any goals that you have set for yourself going into this course and hope you are able to make the most out of your uni life!
ReplyDeleteHello Mr Jack. After reading the letter, I think the language used through out lacked concision. Also, there was a lack of indication for your 2 goals in taking this communications module. I think you can elaborate more on your communication strength and weaknesses. Examples could be linking your strength and weakness to their implications in a working environment, or you can back those statements with justification for it being a strength/weakness.
ReplyDeleteHi, I feel that grammar and punctuation could be more taken care of in this letter. There are also some redundant words. However, it is still overall comprehensible. Ending is also well written, and this letter is still very insightful as to introducing you as a person.
ReplyDeleteIt's a pleasure to read this letter, Jack, as it clearly demonstrates what makes you seem more outgoing than some of your classmates. It's clear as you mention your social nature that you can hold your own in conversations while interacting with others. This trait will be invaluable as you get into the banking industry.
ReplyDeleteOne trait that you haven't mentioned but which should go hand in hand with your confidence and sociability would be leadership. Making people feel comfortable" and facilitating productive interaction" äre key ingredients that you altready seem to have, so I challenge you to setp up this term and be a team leader. You will stand to benefit in terms of the communication skills that you'll be honing as will the classmates who have the chance to work with you.
Despite your obvious fluency, there are a few examples in the letter where sentence structure/punctuation can be improved for grammatical accuracy:
-- I joined CCA is because it is the last few years of my student life... > ?
-- One of my strengths lies in my sociability, I find it easy to initiate and maintain conversations and collaborate effectively with others. > (comma splice) ?
-- This attribute of mine will come in handy when I am working in a group project be it for school or in work, I am able to communicate and work well with my groupmates. > (comma splice)
I look forward to witnessing your growth as the terms unfolds.
Best wishes,
Brad
Hello Prof Brad, it's my pleasure to receive such constructive feedbacks and advice from you, I would definitely use these feedbacks to improve both myself and my introduction letter.
Delete